We have all been around those people. You know the ones I am talking about. The fortunate person. The person who has lived life being fed by the silver spoon. We hear his or her stories, and problems and ponder in our minds about how better off that person is. But, what we never do, is take the time to understand the most crucial, the most important, the most significant fact about differences in economic and social upbringings.
You cannot change what you were born into.
Sure, you may be born into poverty and win the lottery, but that is uncommon and deflects from my underlying point. Life is about luck. We are all dealt cards when we are welcomed into this earth. Yes, some people have more cards than others. Some people have really nice cards that give them many options of which hand to play. Others can only lay one card, and it won't get them far in the game. Though this is hard to accept, its simply how society has been construction.
Now, the reason why this is important to understand is because it fuels how we manage our lives. It is essentially the basis of most politics and many wars. When someone is raised in a different situation than you, be it better or worse, you cannot blame them for being different from you.
Perhaps society has begun to lose its empathy.
You see, I heard a story the other day about my friend's upbringing. I heard about large houses (that is owning multiple family properties) with glorious ground plans and lush locations. The pure indulgence this person had as a child was astounding. Immediately I felt uncomfortable. How could I share a similar story? I come from very humble means. Most people in my area can barely afford one property, and if they own a second its usually a hunting camp with an outhouse and no running water. After a moment of allowing my mind to run into the depths of jealousy, I began to realize... This person never knew anything other than what was just described. To be honest, my stories about going camping and exploring the wilderness may very well be equally as begrudging.
Often we lose track of what we were given in spite of what we were not. The negative parts of our lives become a flood and encompass all that makes us unique and different; The things that we are thankful for. The things that helped shape us as individuals. No everyone was granted a freshly waxed limousine as a chauffeur to senior prom, just as not everyone was granted a bonfire by the cool, flowing river in the back yard. Take and accept your gains, because someone else will think they're just as special as you think theirs' is.
Jeff--you're making some good points here. I particularly agree with the empathy part.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first went to college I felt really insecure about my upbringing and my home until I spoke with my roommate and she told me about her own home in a tiny apartment on a crowded street in Philly where random acts of violence are so common that people barely bat an eye when a drive-by shooting occurs. This isn't the stuff of fiction--it's real life and it's information that's readily available if someone steps outside of their sheltered world. The most important thing I learned was to check my privilege. Middle class life isn't nearly as hard as people claim. And coming from a different class isn't an excuse for ignoring the plight of others. We are responsible for both counting our blessings and alleviating the suffering of others. It's difficult to chalk it up to "bad luck" when you consider the historial, social, and racial components of class and the way our society systematically disenfranchises entire groups of people.